Saved by His mercy
I have been attending church since I was 4 years old and was baptized at the age of 8. My family has been very active in church my whole life, and I have served personally on many different committees and even helped lead my youth group my junior and senior year of high school.
However, because of the unhappiness in my life, I started struggling with depression and began cutting at a very early age. I never felt worthy, and I felt as though God had abandoned me, leaving me to deal with my problems on my own. I felt as though I had the weight of the world on my shoulders, constantly trying to please everyone around me, and never being very successful. I felt alone in the world and didn’t realize that Christ was standing there, waiting to help me off my knees.
When I went to college, a secular university, I easily fell into the temptations of college life. My grades never suffered, but I gave into peer pressure because of my longing to fit in with others. However, there was still a hole in my life that I couldn’t figure out how to fill.
It was during my sophomore year of college that I decided there was no reason for me to continue on. Alone in my apartment one night, I tried to take my own life. I was hurting so badly that I didn’t care what people would think or who I would hurt; I was selfish and tried to take the easy way out. When I woke in the middle of the night, I was very sick and called my parents. I refused medical attention because I knew, at that point, God had already decided to spare my life. I knew that God alone spared me.
I would like to say that was my turning point, and that’s when I came to Christ, but I’d be lying. I came home for a year and fought against any personal relationship with God. I quickly because engrossed back in earthly pleasures and didn’t care that I wasn’t getting any satisfaction in them.
Due to circumstances outside of school, I had to leave the university I was attending, so I decided to attend another university. I knew that I needed a change in my life, and God had been working on me for six months prior to my decision to change schools. I have never been happier than I have at this school. I have truly enjoyed the structure and discipline that it gives us as students. I know that God is calling me to give it all to him; he has worked numerous miracles in my life, starting with saving me from my own demons.
I have already noticed changes since I have come to this university, and I’m proud to say that, after battling 10 years of self-harm, I have been freed from them for five months. I just had to allow myself to give it all to Christ, my rock and my savior, before I could truly be happy. I have truly been saved by HIS mercy.
Thanks for your comment on ReachOut.com! We moderate all comments to ensure the site is safe and supportive. Your comment should appear within 24 hours if it is approved. If you want to see if someone has replied to your comment, please come back and check out this page again.