My nickname is Kelsey Rayne, and I am 16. I wear neon tights, and tutus. My hair is never the same color for more than a month, and I am a photographer in training. Like most teen girls, I just want to be liked, skinny, beautiful and smart.
Fate has different plans for me.
My father was very sick when I was young. We had lots of bills and little money. By the age of 13, I was basically raising my younger siblings. My schoolwork suffered, and I was depressed. I tried to avoid people and kept my nose in the books. When I couldn’t, I turned to the blade to keep my mind off my problems. Winter would pass, and I would have to wear long sleeves all the time. None of my friends noticed, and my family didn’t appear to care. I was scared, sad, and alone.
Then I met a boy. He was smart, funny, and cute. But things moved too fast, and I allowed myself to be pressured to do things I regret. My self-harm became worse, and I became truant.
I started blogging about my experiences, and received an amazing amount of support from people I had never met, but felt as if I did. They encouraged me to stop cutting, to stop hiding, and to be who I was meant to be. Because of them, I grew out of my shell, and stopped hiding from reality.
I no longer feel the need to hide my scars and am no longer ashamed of who I am. Sometimes I get weird looks and snickers, but I ignore them.
It does get better. It may not sound like much, but I went through hell and back. If I can do it, you can too. Just because it isn’t said, doesn’t mean you aren’t beautiful, smart, and amazing.