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Real Story

Opening the jar


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My name is Grant, and I’m gay. Or bi. Or somewhere in between. For a long time I agonized over which one it was, and I still am if truth be told. It was two weeks short ago that I came out to a couple of good friends over a good burrito. Before this I had just liked boys (and occasionally girls) and let it be, but once I was faced with the question “Grant, are you gay,” I had to answer and I could not bring myself to lie, I did not want to and I am glad I did not.

So I answered “yes.” And I felt relieved, like a splinter being removed. But then I dawned on me that now I have been labeled. I have always looked down at the whole idea of sticking people in jars like that with distaste. I realized I couldn’t be completely gay, I still liked women sometimes (if not often). I felt a bigger splinter being put in its place.

My pain was crushing but short lived. It quickly dawned on me that I had not been labeled like a butterfly in a jar, but described, like a naturalist jotting notes down about a butterfly in a field. These titles given to us by society are no more than that. You don’t have to adhere to them, not at all! I decided to be who I am. I am not gay, I am not bi or straight or anything but Grant. And Grant likes boys, sometimes girls, chocolate ice cream and good books.

You can’t get through life without people describing you, but this is so that they can understand you, they don’t have the benefit of being in your head. Let them observe, but not capture. Open up your jar, and be yourself, whoever that is.



  • avatar2

    Reply - Quote

    Kevin Sedano

    Well i  could tell you that its human nature that someone judges you. I dont like it but it is what it is. I to have been in that category of being judge for being gay i was judeged by many but i never cared about what they said. since i had only one frend (girl) that was gay to and she accepted me for who i am. as long as you got one person that takes you in for you you will be ok. there is someone out there that will accept you.

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