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Just one last time

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Overcoming my addiction to drugs and alcohol

It was right when school got out this June, my sophomore summer going into junior year. I believed it was time for me to grow up and try new things. Turns out that was the wrong idea to think. 

I remember this day like it was yesterday. It was my first time taking one of my friends out with the rest of my friends. I decided to go to an all-ages club with her, and had already been drinking for a while. But, this time, I thought I could handle and mix ecstasy with drinking because everyone else was doing it.  Let me tell you, that was the worst thing I could have done ever.

After that happened, I got addicted. I could not stop; that’s all I wanted to do, every day, and sadly that is what I did. I started going to raves, lying to my father, telling him places he thought I would be, stealing money, walking around down town with my friends intoxicated, thinking I was having so much fun. But, the worst part of this was that I was in summer school and going to school all hung over, barely getting by and never studying. Luckily, since I was taking Spanish, which was a language I already knew, I passed.

After summer school got out, it got even worse. I went to more raves, went out more and was never home. Then, I went on to trying meth, mixed with liquor and drugs. Sadly, this time I thought I was in love with a guy who I met at a rave. Turns out he just wanted to have sex with me, and since he was older and had so many good things going for him, I thought he would take care of me. But, when I did it with him, he never texted me again and dumped me from his life.

As summer started to come to an end, I had band camp coming up, and I knew I had to start running and getting into shape because I had missed every rehearsal prior just because I needed sleep. It was the worst feeling ever, knowing that I was letting my group down. I noticed I couldn’t speak right, talk or remember the music we had to play. I forgot common things, and well, it was all because of what I did that summer. After band camp ended, I felt like a new person. I told some of my friends what I did.  My friend and I cried to each other and took a break from hanging out with each other because we noticed who we were becoming.

Sadly, when she left to Missouri, I had a relapse and went to a party thinking I could handle one drink. But, after that I took a bottle and pounded it. Later that night, I woke up in a city where the older guy lived. I had no clue how I even got there with my friend. Everything that night was a blur, but I knew we had just finished having sex.

After this, it was my breaking point.  I told my stepmom everything, and she was so supportive and helped me through it all. From that day I have been sober, even though to this day I sometimes think “Maybe?” But, you know what, in the end nothing is worth losing your memories, losing your closest friends, having it in your body forever, not being in control, forgetting things, not caring and being selfish. It hurts yourself more than anyone. We are all individuals with a cause, and to throw it away is pointless.

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