Looking back, I made a lot of progress this year. I learned a lot of important lessons about living on my own and advocating for myself. I didn't do so well with self-advocacy but I'll try to improve that next year. It's hard to keep appointments and to remember to contact people.
I've learned to recognize when I'm depressed or anxious, and to take action. I managed to talk myself out of an anxiety attack when I tried to call Mom and Grandma and I couldn't reach either of them. I was freaking out thinking they had both died at the same time, then I realized that I was going to have a panic attack if I didn't calm myself down. I felt the warning signs: detachment from reality, tightness in my chest, a lump in my throat. I made myself think of other reasons they didn't pick up the phone that didn't involve death or serious injury. I told myself to wait a few hours and then try calling them back again. I also have learned to pay attention to the warning signs of depression: not wanting to do anything, heaviness in my limbs, low self-esteem. There's not much I can do to talk myself out of depression, but I do force myself to get up and do something productive so I don't feel even worse about myself. Even if it's just putting on jeans instead of sweatpants to go to class. I have episodes of depression now, it's not a constant state of mind, and those episodes are getting shorter.
I still have a lot of work to do, but I've managed to get my mental illnesses under control for the most part. In 2016 I'll set up weekly meetings with the counselor because biweekly meetings are too hard to keep track of. I'll also try to color in a coloring book every day since I can't meditate. I'll try to avoid politics except to do basic research before I vote. I'll take a walk every day, weather permitting. I'm trying not to make any vague resolutions for 2016 because I'm more likely to do something if I have a plan, not just an idea.
In short, this year was an important one for understanding myself. I hope to use that new understanding to continue improving myself for next year. Thank you, ReachOut.com for being there when I need someone to talk to at 3 AM, no matter how ridiculous my issues were!