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Thread: I am defective

  1. #1
    ReachOut Regular xSami_Sometimesx's Avatar
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    I am defective

    This has not been the best few weeks for me for whatever reason. From the 26th to this point. Do I know why? No. I feel defective. I had a complete meltdown today. Punched the wall, paced around the house, started talking to myself trying to calm down, started shaking, couldn't breathe, my heart felt like it was racing and i felt like everything was slowing down in my mind like i was going to pass out.
    In my mind, all heard after i calmed down was "defective"
    I don't feel anything right now. I want to sleep and can't.
    I don't know what's wrong with me.
    I am stressing out over all kinds of things and i can't calm down.
    I don't know what else to do i have tried everything i can think of and it isn't helping

  2. #2
    Moderator Mandy_Moderator's Avatar
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    Hello xSami_Sometimesx,

    It sounds like you’re feeling so overwhelmed right now, and I’m really so sorry for that. You are not defective. You are a wonderful, caring person who is experiencing a tough time.

    Today sounds like it was really stressful. It must have been scary feeling that way. How about turning on some music (maybe something from one of your top 5’s) and finding a peaceful place to sit and relax? When I’m feeling stressed, I find it helpful to take a warm bath, drink some tea (or cocoa) and then read, write, or listen to music. Perhaps take a notepad and pen with you, and write it out. Sometimes through writing down the things on your mind, you’re able to draw a new perspective.

    http://us.reachout.com/facts/factsheet/stress
    http://us.reachout.com/facts/factsheet/panic-attacks

    Talking with someone is helpful is well. Maybe someone in your family or a trusted friend. The helpline Your Life Your Voice is always available as well. Just in case you don’t have that number saved somewhere, it’s 1-800-448-3000.

    We’re here for you, and I’m so glad that you came to talk with us.
    Note: The ReachOut Forums will be suspended after December 31, 2015. All existing threads and posts will still be available to read and review, but no new posts will appear. We hope to gain new funding, and be back soon, but in the meantime, here are some places where you can keep talking and get support:

    -- Your Life Your Voice
    -- Ok2Talk
    -- American Foundation for Suicide Prevention
    -- Trevor Project Trevorspace for LGBTQIA youth
    -- ReachOut Australia forums

  3. #3
    ReachOut Regular xSami_Sometimesx's Avatar
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    I listened to music and stuff and just tried to breathe but it didnt help much I ended up pacing the house for almost two hours tried playing a game and couldn't focus on it. I feel mentally exhausted. I don't know what's been getting to me but I haven't had a breakdown like that in about a month or two.

  4. #4
    Moderator Mandy_Moderator's Avatar
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    Hello Sami,

    I think it's really telling of how resourceful and strong you are in that you tried to find a coping strategy that would work for you when you needed it. It sounds like it was a bit of a struggle finding one that worked entirely, and had some trouble finding focus. Feeling mentally exhausted like that can really make things difficult, and I'm so sorry that you're feeling this way.

    We care about you, and we're all here for you!
    Note: The ReachOut Forums will be suspended after December 31, 2015. All existing threads and posts will still be available to read and review, but no new posts will appear. We hope to gain new funding, and be back soon, but in the meantime, here are some places where you can keep talking and get support:

    -- Your Life Your Voice
    -- Ok2Talk
    -- American Foundation for Suicide Prevention
    -- Trevor Project Trevorspace for LGBTQIA youth
    -- ReachOut Australia forums

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