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Thread: My heart breaks

  1. #1
    Ninja ihavemycat's Avatar
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    My heart breaks

    As I write this my heart is breaking and my eyes are teary. Last week a family friend who was like an Aunt to me passed away. Her and her husband never had children but they had two dogs that were their babies. Her husband just retired and they had bought a big beautiful house to live in together. She suddenly died due to a benign tumor that damaged her liver. It breaks my heart thinking about him alone. They were each others' worlds. She was so young and it just isn't fair that such a loving young woman was taken like this.

    Yesterday my best friend called me. Her stepdad died suddenly while driving her autistic younger brother to school. He watched his father die and didn't understand what had happened. He called 911 and there was nothing they could do. She asked me to fly out for the funeral and God knows I would if I had the financial ability to... I feel as though I am surrounded by death and bad news lately. Yesterday my dog was also attacked by another dog, she is recovering fine but everything seems so scary and surreal right now. Everyone I know is mourning and in pain and I suppose I am mourning the loss of these people as well. I hate seeing my family and friends hurt like this, and there is nothing I can do.

  2. #2
    Administrator Laura_Moderator's Avatar
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    Hi ihavemycat,

    I am so, incredibly sorry to hear about the losses that you and those close to you are suffering from right now. Do you have someone that you can talk to about all of these things? it can be hard to open up about grief and loss, but it really can help to talk to someone.

    I'm sure your best friend understands that you would be there for her if you could afford it. Perhaps you could send her some flowers, or something to let her know you're thinking of her in this difficult time? It would be cheaper than flying out there, but you'd still be doing a little something extra to let her know you cared. You can also let her know that you're there for her if she wants to talk about the situation, or even not talk about it. When I lost a really close family member, my best friend was my rock. She spent hours on the phone with me, talking about anything and everything except the loss I had recently experienced. My talks with her gave me a chance to 'be normal' and not have to talk about loss and grief because I was getting so much of that from the rest of my family, and I will always be thankful for her being there and giving me an escape of sorts.

    No matter how hard things are feeling, remember that you're not alone in this. We will always be here for you!

    Stay strong, there will be brighter days ahead.
    Note: The ReachOut Forums will be suspended after December 31, 2015. All existing threads and posts will still be available to read and review, but no new posts will appear. We hope to gain new funding, and be back soon, but in the meantime, here are some places where you can keep talking and get support:

    -- Your Life Your Voice
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  3. #3
    Ninja ihavemycat's Avatar
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    Thank you for your encouragement and that is a great idea to send her flowers, I didn't even think of that! Thank you for the suggestion. We always talk a lot and especially now, she has been good about opening up to me and deciding to see a grief counselor. Last night I think it all just hit me and I figured coming here to vent was better than not doing anything about it. Thank you for reading and helping me.

  4. #4
    Administrator Rachel_Moderator's Avatar
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    Hi Ihavemycat,

    You are going through so much right now. I am so very sorry for all of the losses that you have experienced in so short of a time.

    I'm glad that you came here to share your feelings and get support. Grieving loved ones and going through the grief process is difficult and can involve a lot of different emotions. Are you taking some time to relax and care for yourself?

    We're all concerned about you and care about you. We're here when you need to talk.
    Note: The ReachOut Forums will be suspended after December 31, 2015. All existing threads and posts will still be available to read and review, but no new posts will appear. We hope to gain new funding, and be back soon, but in the meantime, here are some places where you can keep talking and get support:

    -- Your Life Your Voice
    -- Ok2Talk
    -- American Foundation for Suicide Prevention
    -- Trevor Project Trevorspace for LGBTQIA youth
    -- ReachOut Australia forums

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